My reply to Cyren

It is indeed difficult to live as an LGBT in this world. No one would dare say no to that. Stepping out from the closet is a very big leap of faith because stepping out literally means being known to those around you as who you are, as an LGBT. Along that comes both verbal and physical abuse. When we walk out there on the streets, those eyes, those lips, some throw bottles, some may spit; that I wouldn’t dare say “It doesn’t happen”. It does. Those eyes will never be the reason we stop fighting. Those lips will never be the reason we pull down our hopes, those bottles will never be the reason we give up on life, that saliva spitted in front of us will never be the reason we get discouraged. Why? Because those are the reasons why we stay strong, and those are the reasons we hope, and we fight; because no matter what, life gets better, and life is certainly worth living. We are all made worthwhile. Don’t let anyone or anything tell you otherwise. 

Courage is very important is such fights, especially when we are fighting against what is to be said as “the norm” and we being “deviants”. Courage is like a weapon. Without courage there will be doubts, and when doubts come, we will have fear in us. And because we have this fear, we get torn apart. But, I do not see the fact that we having the “ability” to maneuver and evolve, the ability to have multiple “masks” as a downturn or a downfall in our integrity. If we blindly go to war with too much rage in us, we fall. I have learnt while reading from a friend to “meet like with like”; something more or less like an eye for an eye. If they speak friendly, we return that friendly favor. If they get physical, then we get physical. If they get rough, we get the rough going. What we are fighting for here is equality, or rather, LGBT rights. I wouldn’t call it “equality” because we will certainly be different from heterosexuals in some certain ways, but LGBT rights, human rights, this is what we are fighting for. So there’s no point going over the boiling point if it is not reached. 

Why that certain “time or place”? Not many people have the liberty having that much courage in them. Not many have the same liberty as some who are exposed to many LGBT friends. Sad to say, LGBT education and advocacy is for some gays themselves. So, why that certain “time or place” in this big wide planet? As you have enjoyed those moments with Raymond, those little time spent, these people who did not have all those “liberties” can now be more exposed and at the same time more encouraged to be able to express who they are. Slowly but surely, things will get better. One day, these are the people who will walk out and fight with all the courage they’ve gathered. This is the place they will find people like them, people who cares for them and people who can encourage them, the same way you felt having friends that made you feel safe. And we do all of these in hopes that one day, “every day and everywhere” would replace “a time or place”. Even if we do not achieve that today, we should not despair as long as things get better and it has indeed gotten better. If we do not achieve complete freedom today, we do what we can for those of tomorrow. If those of tomorrow does not achieve that either, then the from the day after tomorrow will get it one. One day, it will. 

With the biggest love for all.
-Edwynn Yeap-